In my first yoga class of each new year, I set an intention. Yes I tell myself to focus on the present and not get frustrated if I fall on my face during crow pose (which has happened), but I also set one for the entire year. A kind of mental regroup statement to put me back on the right path when I sway, or in my case, swerve and crash, taking out my fellow yogis like dominoes.
Last year my intention was Positive Thoughts. Those two words were designed to help me through life’s challenges, as well as my writing journey (I had just finished a year of querying my first book and received – cough cough – 100+ rejections – on the bright side, I received one full request and one partial).
So with positive thoughts in mind, I finished my second book, won third place in a novel writing contest, and a spot in Sun versus Snow (go Team Snow!) But, as 2015 winded down and the rejections piled up, it was hard to keep my thoughts positive. Until I found a few things that worked.
What can you do to combat the rejection blues?
1. Scream. Kick or punch something (not someone).
Be upset and angry. You have every right. Someone just turned down heart and soul. It hurts. Stomach queasy, heart ache kind of hurt.
2. Ask yourself why you do this?
Is it for the money? If so, you may be disappointed. Is the pain worth the possible joy?
My mom, AKA: my #1 fan, insists I would pay people to let me write. She’s right. I do this because I love it.
3. Research the writing histories of writers you admire.
I’m not saying you should relish in the pain of others, but it is comforting to know that even the bestsellers and most popular writers didn’t break into the business overnight. In other words, it’s not you, it’s all of us.
Stephen King nailed rejection to his wall.
Beth Revis wrote ten books before being published.
Sarah Dessen wrote thirteen unpublished books both before and after being published.
4. Keep positive comments from industry professionals.
Even a rejection can let you know you’re on the right path.
I was rejected by my dream agent, but she did take the time to say she liked my writing. I saved that email and whenever my thoughts turned negative, I reread her message.
5. Write about it.
Use this topic as free writing or journal entries. Not only will you get your feelings out, just the act of writing improves your craft.
6. Set an intention.
If you’ve never done this before, give it a shot. You don’t have to practice yoga to use the tips to keep your thoughts positive.
In my first yoga class of 2016, I set a new intention: Happiness is in the Journey.
Yes I want to be published, and paid, and hold an actual copy of my book in my hands, but above all else, I love writing the story. For me, I’m happiest on the journey from idea to completion.
HALLI GOMEZ teaches martial arts and writes for children and young adults because those voices flow through her brain. She enjoys family, outdoors, reading, and is addicted to superhero movies. You can find her on Twitter.
Halli, this is a good reminder. “Happiness is in the journey.” I forget that so often! Good to see you and I’m proud of your award! We will spur one another on and keep remembering that we’re doing this for the LOVE of it!